Anxiety is a Choice
I read William Glasser’s book entitled Choice Theory. Glasser asserts that depression, anxiety and anger are all choices we make. In fact in his counseling method he does not allow expressions such as “I am depressed.” Instead he encourages his patients to think of a phrase such as “I am depressing.” This sounds funny at first and can be misinterpreted, but he is encouraging the patient (or you or me) to take responsibility for our choice to depress or anger or anxietize.
This morning I was tempted by debilitating anxiety mostly caused by a lack of money. My wife and I have started doing some stretching exercises in the morning and somehow this lifted my feeling of anxiety just enough that I was able to think about choosing something else.
We choose unpleasant feelings like anxiety and depression because there is some payoff. Sometimes they are useful for a time. For instance it is better that I depress for a brief period if I would otherwise express my anger by throttling someone. I have discovered that I sometimes depress when I feel overwhelmed and I wish to be saved. This is a pattern established in my childhood in relation to my parents who would often seek to intervene when I seemed to need it. Now there is no one around me to take that role. I found myself transferring that hope of rescue towards my wife who does not play by my twisted rules. Choice Theory has helped me countless times from going down a fruitless and wasteful path of depression.
